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The father-daughter relationship is special; every girl needs her daddy to support her and love her as she finds her way through the world and where she fits into it. While it can be instinctual to want to protect your daughter and shield her from the big bad world, that can backfire and lead to stress and strain the relationship. But as a father, how can you help your daughter as she ages and dips her toes into the world?
Listen to Her
In many cases, what children need, both sons and daughters is for their parents to listen to them, not preach to them. While you have been there and done that, or you want your child to avoid something altogether, you cannot live their life for them, and you also can't shield them from the world forever. So take your time to listen to them, look at how they act, the words they use, and any changes in their behavior. In many cases, if there is a problem, your daughter won't need you to find a solution for her or take charge. Simply listen to what she has to say. This can be for anything, even if it seems trivial to you.
Discussions are Key
Avoid dictating to your daughter wherever possible. It doesn't matter how old she is, be it 13, 19, or 35; discussion will always have a better outcome than dictating. The reality is if you forbid something, then it instantly becomes more desirable.
Allow the opportunity for a discussion and talk through things logically to help her make the right decisions. It might mean she needs to make mistakes before you come around to your way of thinking, but mistakes are essential for building character in many cases. You can still use this opportunity to discuss what you would do differently next time. Whether it is something as minor as discussing curfew times or more serious, such as choosing the right car for her, relationship worries, or something career-based, discuss, not dictate.
Be Interested
Or if you aren't fake it. This is especially important if you're a parent to both sons and daughters, as dads can sometimes prefer to be more active with their sons due to having more common interests.
But girls will pick up on this even if you don't think they have. They will know if you aren't interested, so try to take the initiative and be present in their life as much as possible. While a topic like Textured Bangs Vs. Wispy Bangs: How To Tell The Difference might not be something you necessarily want to spend your time talking about; it might be important to your daughter to get your input, so at least pretending to be interested in decisions can help you to build a bond and support her when she needs it, It isn't always about the big protective gestures she will remember later in life. It will be how much support you gave her, even for the small, seemingly insignificant details.
Praise Her
Everyone needs a confidence boost from time to time, and your daughter is no exception. But think about how you compliment your daughter. Not all girls want to be told they look pretty only. Try complimenting your daughter on other aspects of her personality and character, such as when she shows exceptional kindness or does something without asking. Celebrate new achievements, her intelligence, or sense of humor, for example. Focus on all parts of who she is as a person to show her that you see who she is and what she is about and you are paying attention.
Be an Ally
There is no denying it's a different world for girls and women than it is for men, and it doesn't matter how old your daughter is; she will need an ally, not just a parent. Being in her corner means giving her help and support when needed without judgment or fear of retribution.
This applies even if it makes you feel uncomfortable. Don't be the dad who shies away from broaching the more personal topics or changes in a woman's body. If she needs help with her periods or is unsure of what to buy or how to understand what's going on, find it out for her and show her you aren't worried and are there to help. If she's experiencing a broken heart, to her, it's a big deal even if you don't feel it is, so offer her a shoulder to cry on and make her feel better. Avoid dismissing or minimizing her feelings, and give her the space to express herself and share with you how she feels so you can support her and show her you take her seriously.
There are many small things you can do on a day-to-day basis as a good dad to support your daughter, and these tips can help you connect with her more and support that relationship.
